So there I was walking through the desert with the flies and I was thinking about where all these flies could come from? I mean flies have to have something to eat too right like they can't just come from the dry nothing out here. they have to come from the wet, wetness, some kind of organic matter. water's really important. I feel

I feel a little light headed. Water was I thinking about? I guess I'm thirsty. I don't get enough to drink. Not good, especially when you eat a lot of fiber like me. Your colon gets all blocked up.

I've been walking for long enough that my legs hurt, like it would feel really good if I sat down. This is kind of nice because I'm used to being kind of stir-crazy, sitting in a chair all day in front of a computer with my leg bouncing up and down.

I'm not the luckiest man in the world but I kind of like it here. I might die but that's kind of a novel thought, and it's better than being bored.

My name is David Shields and you know you wish you were me.

I've left behind the office job because I wanted to. I worked in public relations and I did what you call positive emotional labor, I was happy all the time. Apparently there are three types of emotional labor, negative neutral and positive. Prison guards 911 operators and salespeople. There's evidence that positive emotional labor is the worst and nobody of course thinks to ask if anything's wrong if you're happy all the time.

So I was happy all the time and this wasn't enough and I left and went for a walk and now there are all these flies.

In my nose and around my eyes

rhyming is

it's evidence of something I want to avoid. The patterns I want to avoid the patterns. That's why I started walking. Language, jobs, reports and traffic signals and things to fill out, numbers on the internet go up, rent is due, they go down again and then

the desert is different and I just keep walking. It smells like dirt, dry dirt, clean dirt. I keep pushing my way through the web of guilt I feel, like a physical lethargy like breaking the patterns takes effort, you know it does because you know how bad you would feel if you just didn't go to school or to work one day, just didn't show up. That day everything is different and it feels like failure at first, and then like the sweetest success for awhile, and then like failure again as all the consequences come crashing down.

But things can only crash down if you build them up, consequences only matter if you care, about them, about staying in the good graces of the boss on the other end of the phone or the parents at the other end of the state or the introspection at the other end of your life. If all of a sudden you stop caring then the narrative is disrupted and you're left, you're left where?

In the desert.

That's why I like this place so much. Did I say that already?